A Maiden Night Watch, Domestic Intercessions, and the Art of Deciphering Accents
Image: An unexpected reception at the Chief’s cabinโ-โwhere a gentle domestic intercession saves a nervous young 5th Engineer from a fierce tongue (Image credit: Grok AI)
Authorโs Note:
Girisaแนโs Coffee Shop, nestled under the cool shade of a sprawling tree, is a sanctuary for minds and souls to relax and unwind after a rigorous trek up the steep slopes of scholarly, educational, and technical stories. Here, there are no three-minute quick fixes for losing weight or gaining riches.
Enjoy a piping-hot cup of coffee paired with delicious snacksโwhere humor is the main ingredient, seasoned with a splash of high-seas maritime adventures, tales of Bhishma, and timeless mythology. No action is expected or required from you.
Pause to take in the panoramic view of the hills and cascading waterfalls before resuming your trek toward knowledge! Dr. Mehmet Yildiz and Dr. Michelle Broadly would surely recommend a healthy dose of humor as the perfect complement to any nutritional diet and exercise regime. Humor is the best medicine!
An Unexpected Encounter at the Chiefโs Cabin
I knocked timidly on the Chief Engineerโs cabin door and waited in the dimly lit alleyway. My heart was thumping loudly against my ribs like a trapped bird; I simply could not believe that within a mere few hours of joining my very first vessel, I had already managed to secure an emergency face-to-face meeting with the Chief Engineer just to receive a thorough pasting.
The heavy wooden door swung open smoothly, but the formidable figure I had prepared myself to face was nowhere to be seen. Instead, the door was opened by a very fair-complexioned, short lady tenderly holding a chubby one-year-old boy in her arms.
โYes?โ she asked softly, looking at me with gentle curiosity.
For a completely crazy, frantic moment, my bewildered brain wondered: Has marine engineering in India advanced so rapidly that mothers of one-year-old toddlers can now become Chief Engineers on merchant ocean liners? Then, practical realization dawned on me.
โGood evening, Maโam,โ I said as politely as my trembling voice would allow. โChief Engineer sir asked me to meet him.โ
โOh, I see!โ she replied, adjusting the quiet baby on her hip. โYou areโฆ?โ
โI am Girisam, the new 5th Engineer, Maโam,โ I told her, standing at rigid attention in my fresh boiler suit.
She looked at me thoughtfully for a brief second. โAre you a non-vegetarian? It is quite tough on these long voyages for vegetarians.โ
โI am a pure vegetarian, Maโam,โ I assured her with a modest smile. โBut there is no problem at all! I brought homemade spicy pickles from home. I will manage somehow.โ
She smiled back warmly. She was smiling ear to ear just as the Chief Engineer entered the living room from the adjoining bedroom, scowling intensely with a deeply furrowed brow.
Domestic Realities and โHis Masterโs Voiceโ
As she turned to step gracefully back into the bedroom, she paused, looked at her husband, and said, โListen, Nandu, this young boy is a vegetarian. Be very gentle with him tonight. These young boys are extremely sensitive and get demoralized very fast.โ
He looked at her, his stern posture softening instantly. โYes, dear,โ he replied meekly.
His original, elaborate plan of having me fried in boiling hot oil for my earlier blunder over the telegraph was thoroughly doused with cold water by โHis Masterโs Voice.โ
When the cabin door had first swung open, I had caught a quick glimpse of an ornate, dark hairpiece resting on a wooden stand upon his side table. He glanced sideways at it, visibly tempted to put it on to project an air of formidable authority, but then reluctantly decided against it.
The Chief Engineer was exceedingly fair-complexioned, much like a European, and completely bald. In fact, he was as bald as an egg. His absolute baldness was striking, brilliant, and completely attention-grabbing. Normally, when you come across bald people in daily life, some other prominent physical feature โ like a bulbous nose, very bushy eyebrows, a pronounced double chin, or elephantine ears โ will grab your primary attention rather than their bare scalp. But anyone coming across this particular Chief Engineer would look exclusively at his gleaming bald pate, and while engaged in conversation with him, could not take their eyes away from it if they tried.
His poor wife could not escape from it either. It must have been rather depressing for her to have to gaze upon that glossy surface for the entire day. In those traditional seafaring days, Chief Engineers were never supposed to descend into the noisy Engine Room during routine operations. The 2nd Engineers would feel deeply insulted and undermined if a Chief ever set foot on the engine plates unannounced. Consequently, Chief Engineers were virtually confined to their spacious upper-deck cabins for months on end. She must have bought that fancy hairpiece in a foreign port to give her eyes a welcome respite.
He had clearly wanted to put on his wig before opening the door, but his wife, in her innocent haste to answer my knock, had inadvertently exposed her husbandโs shiny bald pate to my wide eyes. Now, feeling thoroughly self-conscious, he wanted nothing more than to get rid of me as fast as humanly possible.
The Mild Reprimand and an Unexpected Ally
I kept my eyes glued firmly to the wooden floorboards while he delivered a surprisingly mild dose of reprimands.
โI will be keeping a very close watch on your daily performance,โ the Chief informed me in a gruff tone. โIf you do not pick up the basic shipboard routines within a month, you can pack your heavy bags and go straight back home.โ
โSir, I assure you that I will not give you a single chance to complain,โ I replied eagerly. โGood night, sir.โ
I turned quickly to leave, but just as I reached the threshold, the Chiefโs wife emerged once more from the bedroom.
โYou go ahead and take whatever extra provisions you want from the chief steward,โ she told me kindly. โThe chief engineer will inform him tomorrow morning. Nandu, donโt forget to tell the chief steward tomorrow.โ
I could distinctly hear the sharp grinding of the Chief Engineerโs teeth as he forced out a strained, tight-lipped, โYes, dear.โ
โDoesnโt he remind you so much of my younger brother?โ she added fondly, beaming at me. โHe has such an innocent face.โ
โYes, dear,โ he echoed, his voice dripping with reluctant surrender. But beneath his breath, I could almost hear the furious gnashing of molars and a muffled curse: โConfound him! I canโt stand the sight of that fellow.โ
โThank you so much, Maโam. Good night, sir; good night, Maโam,โ I said, beating a hasty retreat back down the companionway stairs to the dark, thrumming safety of the Engine Room.
(For the record, after that fateful evening, I never saw the Chief Engineer without his neat hairpiece again โ except once, months later, when he rushed down to the Engine Control Room during a critical main engine emergency and angrily flung his wig onto the desk. If he had possessed real hair, he certainly would have pulled it out in frustration, so tossing his toupee was truly the best expressive course of action available to him.)
The Vanishing Oiler and the Tortured Countdown
Back on the lower engine plates, I could not find oiler Patel anywhere in the noisy space. I searched meticulously for him behind every generator, under every platform, and through the steering gear flat, finally discovering him comfortably curled up and sleeping soundly in a dark, warm corner. I grabbed his shoulder and shook him up.
He woke up with a loud start, rubbed his heavy eyes, and snarled, โWhat the hell is wrong with you?! Why are you disturbing my sleep?!โ
โPatel, you are officially on duty watch!โ I said sternly. โYou should not be sleeping on the job!โ
He laughed aloud in my face. โDonโt teach me my business!โ he mocked bluntly. โYou havenโt even completed a single full day on board this ship, whereas I have been sailing the high seas for donkeyโs years!โ
I narrowly resisted the overwhelming impulse to inform him that his lazy, entitled attitude was precisely what made him a donkey, and turned on my heel to walk briskly back to the quiet, humming safety of the Engine Control Room.
Contd…
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